Friday, June 17, 2011

Fuming Friday - Wedding Preparations

pulling my hair out!!
Ahhhh my Friday post.  Until a few moments ago nothing really made me THAT ranty that it would be considered a "fuming" post.  Cue my IL's response to a request for an itinerary for the wedding that's to occur NEXT weekend that DD, Sonny and my husband are in.

Am I overreacting to this situation?  I welcome your opinions!!! Leave a comment below.

Earlier this week I requested the approximate schedule from my BIL and his Fiancee.  I was told they'd send it to me.  NOTHING.  Today I emailed FIL "do you know what the plan / schedule is for next weekend?  I have no idea what time we are supposed to be to the hotel, if there's a rehearsal, and what the expectation is"

The response?  "I don’t have a timeline but we can chat on Sunday."  This makes me fume.  FUME.  I have two kids involved in this wedding and a week and a day before the wedding I have no idea what the expectation is for them, no idea what time we need to be at the hotel (which is in a shore-resort town) nor what I need to bring for them (ie: rehearsal dinner - clothes?).  I am not a control freak generally, but I like to have an idea of what the expectation might be for my family so that we do not wreak havoc on what is hopefully going to be one of the best days of my BIL and fSIL's lives.  Since FIL reserved our rooms, I have no idea what time I can check in, what TYPE of room we have (will we have a king sized bed or two queens) and if I can bring snacks and store them in the room for Sonny and DD to enjoy for the two days we will be staying there.  As you may know both my hubby and I are unemployed and don't have a ton of extra cash to eat out or order in at a resort town.....

I do not like to live by the seat of my pants.  Since I am consulting for a company in NJ I also need to have a clear idea of where I need to be and what time I need to be there (so that I can schedule time to work on the project and go into the office to collaborate with the team).  And i have TWO KIDS BELOW THE AGE OF 10 WHO NEED TO HAVE SOME SEMBLANCE OF STRUCTURE.

I am being fatalistic here, but I can see how the weekend is going to go already and my stomach is aching. Maybe I can go back to the hospital????  Below is a synopsis of what I think will happen:
Friday:  pack up everything we will need and find a way to entertain the kids on the ride.
Saturday: Arrive at hotel.  Kids will run around in lobby (since we are permissive parents) and create some disturbance.  FIL and BIL will yell at DD to tell her to stop running/skipping/dancing (she's 4.5) and making noise.  FIL and BIL will look at DH and me, communicating via daggers to "control these danged kids" I will take kids out to the parking lot so as to not cause any more commotion or break the fucking eggshells we have to walk on all.the.time.  Hopefully we'll get a room that's not right near my IL's we don't have a knock on the door when my kids/tv/whatever are too loud.

Sunday:  Wedding is on beach.  DD and Sonny will be yelled at to stop playing with the sand, stop dancing round, stop making noise, stop stop stop being kids. (My stomach aches right now).  I will hopefully retain most of my hair follicles.  DH will either yell at his dad and brother or he will pretend nothing's happening and I will have a stroke and fall to the sandy ground and hopefully someone will drag me off the beach before the sandfleas and crabs get to me.   At the reception DD and Sonny will do their level best to garner the attention of every adult in the room.  They will win -- there's no competition between a 35 year old woman no matter how beautiful and  a determined 4.5 year old girl and 9 year old boy who tag team for attention.  They are cute, funny, and noisily annoying.  FIL and BIL will probably yell more at which time my mama bear instincts will kick in full force and I will threaten them (the adults) with bodily harm and remind them that this was their mother effing idea to bring my children to this occasion to be flower girl and ring bearer.  I offered. i offered to have my kids stay with my family . If I am still alive and haven't been transported to the local hospital, I will be drinking wine. If there's wine at the reception (both BIL and his fiancee are recovering addicts but my IL's are potentially there WILL be alcohol).  I will continue to drink wine and eat my meal and pretend that all is well....until I pass out.....and my kids might be allowed to eat cake or dance but who knows.

And I could prepare better for the upcoming weekend of family fun if I knew what the expectations are.  For the record:   BIL and his Fiancee and my IL's said that they want the kids at the wedding and that they'll be so great to be part of it. They'll have fun and have lots to do........but the proof will be in the pudding. Unfortunately my predictions with this family generally come to fruition.


Anyone have a spare room in a quiet, softly padded cell for me?  Please?  I promise I will weep silently so as not to disturb your family members....


  1. I think I'd concentrate on hitting every available open bar situation that presented itself.

  2. I hate not having everything planned out also. My husbands family never gives me any details on family events and I am always having to remind me of how much that annoys me! New follower from bloggy moms, you can find me at

  3. hey - can you pack your own bottle and imbibe on your own (when you have to remove the kidlets from the beach)? I have a great sangria recipe and sippy cup you can (borrow) use. (I need to have it back because i have issues of my own)